He is GOOD!!!!

I absolutely love this song and its one I sing to remind myself how good my God is.

I told someone this morning that we must be on the right path with this adoption because we have been met with so much resistance. Yet again there is a small delay but my God is LARGE and in charge and HIS timing is THE timing.

Despite the set backs I get excited as I allow myself to just rest. To be still. To know He is in control and to pray for His will, not my own.

Thank you Jesus for being so good to us and for your goodness in this whole situation.

Where we are and how we are...This ones for you Mollie.

I had a friend ask me recently where we are in our process and how we are doing. Thanks to Mollie, I am taking a moment to blog which I realize I haven't been very good at lately.

We have had a few ups and downs in the last 4 weeks and a glitch or two which were really upsetting. In fact, we had to wait about 2 weeks while the agencies involved decided if we could even continue our journey. I am not going to post those details however if you ask me in person I will happily share them with you. In fact as this goes along and we meet more and more people going through this process we will be able to encourage others because of what happened with us.

In the beginning of this wait period I was beside myself as was Brian. But then I was quickly reminded Who was in control and Who planted this in our hearts and I rested. Now this didn't mean that I didn't think about it daily or ask Brian if they had called yet but I had full confidence in knowing it was out of my hands and I could rest in the One Who held it.

It was interesting too, because one of my best friends asked me if I was going to call and defend myself to one of the board members of our adoption agency because we are related and I said "No, God is my defender" and I meant every word and had full confidence that no matter how things looked God knows our hearts. 1 Samuel 16:7

While on vacation last week word came back YES! You are fine, here's what you need to do...etc.

So, to the question where we are? We are still gathering some more paperwork needed to complete our home study and should be setting a date for our final interview with our social worker hopefully by the end of June. YAY!!!

How we are? We are amazing! Yes, we had a couple of melt downs but I can honestly say after crying for about 10 minutes I placed it in God's very capable hands and rested in His promises.

I sent out a text to my friend Tracy whom I met at adoption class to pray and she did. (I don't have your number Mollie or you would have gotten one too)

I leaned on several amazing friends here who are huge support to us and just prayed.

It did serve to remind me that you cannot do this alone. Support is everything and knowing others who are going through it is also a huge plus because they understand every step and know how crazy it can be.

Thank you thank you thank you for all your prayers and support. Please keep them coming because we are long way from being finished but we know we are on God's timetable, not our own and that gives us even more peace while on this journey.

Blessings!

A Crazy God Blessed Life.

There is only one word to describe our life over the past 8 weeks. CRAZY!!

The week before Jayden's 12th birthday we went to see this house after Brian's boss had seen some pictures online. He had asked us if we were still looking to move. The truth at that moment was NO! We were happy where we were and had no interest of battling the banks to try and get a loan after we had been denied in November. We figured this was where God wanted us and were quite content.

Still, it did spike our interest especially since it was a log home and a foreclosure that had never been lived in. So, we went. Admittedly it was overwhelming as to how far it was from where we currently lived but even from the outside we loved what we saw. Then we went in. WOW! That's all we walked around saying. We just couldn't believe that it was a foreclosure. It sits on an acre and a half of land and there are only 2 other houses on the other 8 and a half acres. There is also a creek about a minutes walk from the house which we would have full access to for fishing, kayaking etc. So, a week later we made an offer. Well, if you've ever dealt with a foreclosure then you know its a game to see who wins. When it was all said and done I know we won.

Then all the fun really began. That week I broke my arm and life was kind of on hold. So was the house especially when we were denied again. I really just felt that it wasn't God's timing and I wasn't about to get in the way of that so I told Brian we should take a step back. We let our realtor know the situation who in turn let the bank holding the house know and lets just say they wouldn't take NO for an answer. They started all kinds of wheels in motion while Brian and I sat back not knowing which way to go or what decision was right.

Meanwhile I still have a broken arm, we are going from adoption class to social worker interviews, homeschooling, church, work yada yada yada yada.

It just kept on and on, the bank trying to get us financed kept saying we will have an answer in a few days, a few days turned into a few weeks and before we knew it, it was almost the end of March. Brian and I went back and forth wondering, praying, seeking counsel, weighing all our options. Is this our house? If they approve us do we still want it? What about the location? What about our adoption? Could we put all this money down on a house and still find money to complete our adoption? The questions and concerns just wouldn't let up. One minute we would think we had the "final" answer only to come to the next minute and feel like we were drowning. We would rock back and forth between rest and doubt. Then one morning about a week before they came back with a decision it just hit me like a ton of bricks. I just prayed and asked God to cause the choices we make to line up with His will. That is all we wanted. I just had immediate peace and knew that is what would happen. I text Brian who, as the head of our home was struggling because he didn't want to make a wrong decision. I told him how precisely I had prayed for us and the whole house situation and we both just breathed a sigh of relief. 6 days later they called us to say we would be closing 2 days later.

At this point not one box was packed but thankfully we had 30 days until we had to be out of our rental. The whirlwind began the day after closing, Brian and I went to clean the house and pull up the vinyl flooring in the laundry room and downstairs bathroom. Considering the house had been vacant since they finished building it wasn't as dirty as we thought it would be. That same weekend Brian and Jared laid tile in both those rooms and by Sunday afternoon the boys and I took our first load of "stuff" out there.

Monday thru Thursday we took load after load and on Friday the movers came to move all the big items. It was the first time we've ever hired movers but it was so worth it.

So, here we are a week later, we're all unpacked and slowly getting things hung up and put where they need to go. It'll be a work in progress for awhile but we've got nothing but time at this point. We have been so overwhelmed by everything. We simply feel undeserving but know how good our God is. We thank Him daily for this amazing opportunity and will cherish every moment we are blessed to live in this house.

For all of you who have been asking for pics below is a slide show of how the house currently looks. It's pretty basic but it will give you an idea of what it looks like. I hope you enjoy.

Scrapbook personalized with Smilebox

Happy New Year and Fear of the Unknown

Happy New Year!!! Once again it's hard to believe another year has come and gone but here we are ready to start anew.

This can be a really hard time for some people. As we watched the ball drop last night I felt a lump in my throat and fought back the tears as a twinge of anxiety surfaced. See for years I battled depression and anxiety. Most of which are due to me being a control freak and worrier.

As I've grown in my relationship with Jesus I have truly begun to grasp the concept that I don't have to worry about anything. I have literally had moments of pure elation when I realize that even death itself is nothing to fear. Of course those moments quickly pass by and I have to remind myself what I was worrying about. Have you ever been there?

All worrying is is the concept of thinking you are controlling everything and/or everyone in your life. For instance, when I go places with other people I always like to drive because then I am in control of getting to said place safely. It's the exact reason I don't like to fly. I can't see where I am going and someone else is at the controls.

But thats just it. I know the saying "Is God your Pilot" cliche but its so true. Is he?

The reality is we are not in control of anything except ourselves and how we are responding to God's call in our lives. And His basic call to all of His children is to love Him with all our heart, soul, mind etc. and to love others. The rest is gravy. He promised He would never leave us nor forsake us. Hebrew 13:5 So, do I do you really believe that or don't we? I know one thing is for sure. He is not a man that He can lie so if that is what He says then that is what is true. Which means no matter how we feel about this new year and all the unknowns God will be there to walk us through all of it.

I feel blessed to have learned that once I recognize I am worrying I breathe a prayer of thankfulness that God has it under control and is guiding and directing my steps.

Psalm 37:23-24 says The steps of a man are established by the LORD, when he delights in his way; though he fall, he shall not be cast headlong, for the LORD upholds his hand.

I love what this says. All you need to do is delight in His way and even when you do fall He upholds you with His hand. That is just beautiful to me.

So trust in this promise and just wait, peace will follow and you will be blown away by it.

I challenge you today. Rest in God's truths not just for this New Year but for all the New Year's to come and may 2011 bring us even closer to Jesus.